A Month's Worth of Thankfulness

Today is November 30, the last day in this month of "thankfulness".  All month long I have followed people on Facebook and Twitter post the things they are thankful for each day.  A huge majority of them were the same for a lot of people - family, friends, kids, church, a job they love, etc... Some of them I found quite hysterical - ginormous t-shirts, disposable diapers (although I'm VERY grateful for these right now!!) I didn't jump on the "one thing I'm thankful for" each day bandwagon, mainly because my life is so crazy right now with a 3 month old, I can't remember them each day!  However, all month long I have thought about and reflected on what I'm thankful for, and each thing I came up with had one thing in common - they could all be traced back to one of God's promises for my life that he gives us in scripture.  I thought I would share just a few of them:

Matthew 6:25-34 - I Will Provide

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them....But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

I got married at a young age - I was only 20, Eddie was 24.  He had one year of college left, I had 2 years. From the time we got married, we struggled financially.  Eddie was on a student visa and wasn't allowed to work, so I had to work several jobs to make sure we had enough for rent/bills.  After he graduated, he was able to get a good job, but then student loan payments started coming due.  By the 2nd year of our marriage, we almost walked away from one another.  The debt was high and the relationship between us was filled with anger and bitterness from arguing about money all the time.  We decided (as a last resort) to try a few things to save our marriage: 1) We signed up for Financial Peace University and 2) We started attending church together and praying together.  3 years later, we have paid off a significant amount of debt (although we still have a long way to go!), our relationship is stronger than ever and we don't fight about money anymore (in the way we used to).  Once we turned everything over to God and said we'll do the work to fix this and we'll trust that you'll provide, we have been blown away by God's faithfulness to this promise.

Psalm 37:4/Matthew 7:7 - I Hear Your Prayers

"Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart." - Psalm 37:4

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. " -Matthew 7:7

Most people know this story because I've shared it several times on my blog, so I won't go into detail again. Long story short - After 3 years of infertility treatments and begging God for a child, he blessed us with a beautiful, healthy baby boy on August 14.  God knew all along we wanted to be parents, he was just waiting for the right timing (and I'm convinced - for us to TRULY 100% trust that he did have a plan).

Matthew 11:28 - I'll Give You Peace

"Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest."

I can't even pinpoint one exact situation where this has played out in my life, because it has happened over and over.  We all go through ups and downs; we all get tired and burnt out.  It's in these times (though sometimes difficult) that both Eddie & I have gone to God and laid everything down, stating we can't do things our way anymore.  The incredible peace you get when you do that is overwhelming.

Ok, this is starting to get long so I'll wrap things up.  I went through the bookmarks on the Bible app on my phone and found numerous scriptures where God has promised something and I can look at my life and say "Yep, he's come through on that one." "Yep, that one too."  God's faithfulness is one we can't even comprehend.

But the promise I'm thankful God came through on the most happened in Matthew 27, where Jesus was crucified. In Matthew 26, Jesus went to the Garden at Gethsemane and prayed, even saying "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” But Jesus knew what had to be done, as it had been foretold for generations and is written about in the Old Testament.  God came through on his promise, I am a loved and forgiven child of His and because of that, my life will never be the same.

Less than 24 hours

Dear Kaleb,
I can't believe we're here.  Less than 24 hours til your dad and I finally get to meet you.  My heart is overflowing with joy and thankfulness and my eyes are filled with tears. The last 3 (almost 4) years have been an incredible journey and the last 9 months are ones I will never ever forget.  Every time you moved, every time I heard your heartbeat or saw you on the ultrasound monitor, I continually praised God for you and was reminded of his faithfulness.  I know it's selfish of me, but I'm almost not ready for you to come out of mommy's belly yet. The bond that we have formed is incredible and one that I know not everyone (who wants to) gets to experience.

I have so many questions about you I can't wait to have answered. Do you have your daddy's chubby cheeks and dark black hair? Do you have mommy's ability to fall asleep within seconds in just about anywhere?  What kind of things are you going to like? The list goes on and on. One thing's for sure - we promised God when we asked for you that we would raise you to love Him and be his servant, and we'll do everything possible to keep that promise to God.

Kaleb, you're our miracle baby, as daddy calls you. We won't always agree on things and times may get hard, but my love for you will never change.  I'll always be grateful for you and know you are a true gift from God.  I probably won't get much sleep tonight thinking about meeting you, so give your mommy a break tomorrow ;)

I love you to infinity and beyond,

Mommy

So many things to be thankful for...

It was about this exact time one year ago that I was sitting next to Heath Farmer listening to Steven Furtick speak at the Global Leadership Summit.  I had finished Furtick's book, Sun Stand Still, a few weeks prior, and had a heavy heart as I thought about mine and Eddie's sun stand still prayer to have a child.  Heath must have noticed because he leaned over and whispered Psalm 37:4 - "Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."  Words that brought tears to my eyes because at the time, I had felt forsaken by God. After 3 long years with no child, it seemed like it would never happen.

For the next couple of months, Eddie and I prayed like we've never prayed before.  I told God over and over that I was going to keep knocking on the door until I got an answer.

In November, Heath and his wife Rachel had their son, J.P.  Eddie and I were at their house the week after J.P was born, and Heath snapped this photo.

Over and over that night, Heath kept saying that it was going to happen soon. Our turn to have a baby was coming.  I nodded and smiled - about 10% of me hoped what he said was true, the other 90% doubted that it would ever happen.

Then, on December 23, I got the news I was pregnant.  Just a little over one month after the photo above was taken.  God had his hand in the timing of every single aspect.  When I look back, I am so incredibly thankful for people who prayed for us and with us.

I am thankful for a healthy and relatively easy pregnancy.  There were so many days I thought I'd never get to even experience being pregnant.

I am thankful for an incredible husband who has been there for every appointment and ultrasound, and through every mood swing and food craving.

I am thankful for a church family that is supportive, encouraging, and rejoicing with us.

I am thankful for a God that never did leave or forsake us, but instead wrote a beautiful story in our lives where we can truly give Him all the glory.

I am thankful that in a matter of days, Eddie and I get to finally meet and hold Kaleb and become a family of 3.

Prayers for a safe delivery and healthy baby are greatly appreciated. :)

36 weeks. The countdown is on.

Wow, it's been quite a while since I posted! We are down to the 4 week mark for baby Kaleb to come! The doctor confirmed today he is head down and at the point where if I have any more contractions (like I did the other night), they wouldn't do anything to stop them. So glad we got to this point and all is well!  While we are counting down the days til we get to meet our sweet boy, I feel like I'm running through these last weeks in freakout and panic mode. I'm sure this is normal, but I'll still explain...

Nesting.  I'm convinced Eddie doesn't believe this is a real thing and just thinks I'm nuts. The last few weeks I've had several crazy days where I organize, reorganize, clean everything, and still complain that it's not clean enough. Eddie usually just laughs, well, until tonight... I bought a cabinet from Walmart to go in the bathroom and after putting almost the entire thing together  (which took 2 hours), I decided I hated it and we took it all apart and put it back in the box so I could take it back. I seriously wish I could have gotten a picture of his face when I said it was horrible and I didn't want it. Priceless.

Work. We are in a super exciting, yet crazy busy time.  Between the GLS and launching a church (not to mention all the smaller events in between), it's quite easy to become overwhelmed and my head to start spinning.  If you know me, you know I put everything into doing my job well and making sure everything is covered.  Which is where the biggest freakout has come to play. I've tried to make sure everything at work will be covered while I'm on maternity leave - I've trained people to do parts of my job, typed up binders with detailed instructions, and made checklists and more checklists. But I still feel unprepared. And while I'm excited at the thought of spending time with Kaleb, I'm not a "stay at home" kind of person.  I feel guilty that I'm not looking forward to this time more, but I think all the busyness at work right now has me completely preoccupied. Praying I can finalize things at work and feel more prepared for my time off.

All the newborn and 0-3 month clothes are washed, the hospital bag is packed and the nursery is ready (for the most part).  I think all we have left to do is order the extra base for the carseat, and install the bases in our cars. I feel another complete housecleaning Saturday coming on... Kaleb will be here before we know it. :)

Brittney

A Deep Conviction

I seriously can't believe we are only 4 months away from meeting Kaleb. I would be lying if I didn't say that some days my thoughts are absolutely consumed about what life will be like when he gets here.  Yesterday, I was doing ordinary tasks of laundry and washing the dishes (by hand) and it just hit me like a brick how much those things are going to change! I think I have a lot of laundry now....that's definitely going to change!  I also walk into the baby's future room a lot, which is empty right now, and stress that nothing is done.  I am such a planner, and the fact that the crib is sitting in pieces and the room is completely unready makes me a nervous wreck.  It's a good thing I have Eddie to pull me back to reality and reassure me everything will be fine.

So, because of the above, my prayer/quiet time has been lacking. It still is a daily priority, but not at the same (quality) level that it was before we got pregnant. Before, my plea to God about 20 times a day (or more) was to bring us a child. But not only to bring us a child, but several others:
-I follow a blog by a girl named Amy, who writes about how she and her husband have struggled with infertility for almost 6 years
-Eddie and I also got to know 2 other couples at One Life (who we had no other connection with except our infertility struggles) who had been trying to have a child for longer than we had, and had gone through a LOT more medical procedures than we had, with no luck

My daily prayer was that God would bless ALL of us with children, that he would move the mountain of infertility.  I read and prayed Hannah's prayer from 1 Samuel on a daily basis for the 4 of us women who wept often, begging God to make us mothers.

Well, in the past 6 months:
-I found out I was pregnant in December
-One of the 2 couples from church also found out they were expecting and due this fall
-Amy (whose blog I follow) was spontaneously asked to adopt a 6 week old little girl, and is 3 states away from her home waiting on paperwork to finalize the adoption

It seemed that God had finally heard us! Our prayers were all coming true.  However, this week I've been deeply convicted about my lack of continued prayer for the last couple that is still "in waiting". My prayers shouldn't slack off just because I got what I prayed for.  They are still hurting, still begging for God to grant their request too.  At church, we've been challenged to pray mountain moving prayers, and this past week Bret said "You could be God's answer for someone else's prayer."  So with that, my prayers are shifting to this other couple - ultimately that God will bless them with a child, but that they have strength and patience in their waiting, and trust that God's plans are bigger and MUCH better than ours. Please join me in praying for them.

What mountain moving prayers are you praying?   How do your prayers (and your heart) change when you realize and acknowledge that YOU could be God's answer to someone else's prayer?

Best Birthday Ever.

Yesterday was my 25th birthday. This year, however, I celebrated something so much more than just being another year older.  Yesterday morning, Eddie and I had our second ultrasound and found out we're expecting a baby boy.  I woke up at 4:30am yesterday and couldn't sleep, and for the first time felt like it was a boy - so I got to rub that one in Eddie's face! ;) Here are some pictures from yesterday:

Eddie and I waiting so patiently, answering all the "Do you know yet?!?" text messages.

Introducing, Kaleb Wyatt Gomez:

He was being very shy yesterday and kept burying his head down so we couldn't see his face.

Here's my favorite - hand over his face saying "No more pictures!"

The only halfway decent face shot we got, sucking on his thumb.

The doctor had nothing but great things to say yesterday - the baby looks great (currently weighs 10 ounces) and all my cardiology tests came back good!

Eddie and I spent the rest of the day in Evansville. We did our baby registry at Babies R Us and were in there for 3 hours!!  Eddie and I only argued a couple times when he would scan things I thought we didn't need, and we made quite a scene in the stroller and car seat aisle when we were testing them and couldn't get them to fold back up. Travel systems are way too complicated!!  We had a nice lunch and did a little more shopping, and then on the way home he stopped and picked up my only request for my birthday, a Dairy Queen ice cream cake!  My grandma made all my favorites for dinner, topped off with ice cream cake with the family.

I'm pretty sure this is now classified as the best birthday ever.  :)

Brittney

18 week update

After a lot of reflection on things this weekend, I thought it may be time to give an update on here.  It's amazing how crazy life gets and how fast the weeks go by....

I'll be 19 weeks this week.  We find out a week from today if Baby Gomez is a boy or girl.  We can hardly wait!!  It's been 8 weeks since I had the last ultrasound and got to see our sweet child that has captured my heart already.  The thought of seeing him or her (and being able to call him or her by name!) next Monday puts a smile to my face.  I always get anxious going in for appointments and pray that things are developing normally.  But the last few days, the baby has given me reassurance that things are going well- his or her kicks are getting stronger and more frequent, and I love being able to feel them!

In a previous post, I mentioned that last time I was at the OB, my heart was beating pretty fast and I was sent to the hospital for an EKG.  I got a call a few weeks ago that it came back abnormal, so I was referred to a cardiologist.  Last week was my first appointment with him, and it was still pretty fast that day.  I had to wear a heart monitor for 2 days (longest 2 days of my life...those things are heavy!) and had an echo ultrasound of my heart today (and she mentioned it was still pretty fast...)  I should know something soon about what's going on, but please pray for answers.

I do have to give a huge thank you to the Heart Group in Henderson. I have never been to a dr's office where every single appointment was on time, and where you were remembered by name after only being seen once.  The dr. saw me in the hall today after I completed my echo, spoke to me by name, and said he would head back right then to view the results.   The tech also told me it was their policy to call with all results of any test or labs, whether they were normal or abnormal.  I'm used to the "you'll hear from us if there's a problem" policy at other offices, so this was much appreciated.  I highly recommend this office!

On another note, Eddie & I had a great weekend. We got the baby's crib (thanks to one bargain shopping friend and another that transported it to our house!) and started on the nursery. All this weekend, I couldn't stop picturing our lives as a family of three. Everything we did - from getting ice cream on Saturday afternoon, to taking a walk, to dinner with family, all I could see was us as a family of three, and I loved every second of it.  For three long years, Eddie and I dreamed about what life may be like with a child, but wondered if we would ever get to that point.  I feel so incredibly blessed that God has given us this child and we can truly start to imagine what life WILL be like in about 5 months. :)

Please continue to pray for both mine and baby's health.  I'll post again next Monday after we have more ultrasound pictures and find out if we're team pink or team blue!

Brittney

Things I've Learned During Pregnancy (So Far.)

I haven't blogged in a while - mostly because of being a) sick and b) exhausted.  But I'm 15 weeks today and slowly starting to feel better! As I was getting ready this morning, I was thinking a lot about how my life has changed in just 2 1/2 months. (Funny how one little "+" sign can do that ;) Several things came to mind that I may have previously known, but definitely understand or appreciate more now. Just thought I would share:

1) Pregnancy is HARD.
Mentally, physically, emotionally, and even spiritually.  I kind of had an idea it would be difficult, but nothing to this extent.  There are some days I feel absolutely dependent on others, and for those of you who know how independent I am, this has been difficult to accept. It's hard to appreciate anything when you are sick 6-10 times a day.  It's hard to do anything around the house when you fall asleep at 6:00pm and sleep til 6:30 the next morning. It's hard to trust God when all you can think about is "will I be able to afford this child?" and "this house isn't big enough for a baby, let alone everything that comes with a baby."  It's just HARD. I get it now.

2) I've (re-)learned that my husband is incredible and will make an amazing dad.
All the things that have become so hard for me, he has picked up and carried. He does the laundry, cooking, cleaning, and reminds me several times daily that God will provide.  Even when he was in Colombia for 10 days, he checked on me several times a day and sent others to check on me.  I am SO grateful to have him in my life.

3) On most days, I take my health and life for granted, but things can change in an instant.
Yesterday at the doctor's office I had a brief health scare. I went in for my monthly appointment and when having my vitals taken, saw panic on the nurse's face. She called another nurse into the room to "double check her work", and she quickly left. Turns out my blood pressure and heart rate were pretty out of whack and apparently my heart was racing.  They sent me to the hospital for an EKG.  (I still haven't heard the results of it, but my dr's office runs on a "no news is good news" policy, so I'm guessing things turned out ok.)  But it definitely put things into perspective for me - everything we have is a gift and it can be taken away at any moment.

4) It is absolutely possible to fall in love with someone without even meeting them.
I'll admit, I really struggled the first several weeks after I found out I was pregnant. I felt like I should have this instant "strong, emotional attachment" to this child, especially since Eddie and I had prayed for a baby for so long. Of course I prayed for the baby to be healthy and grow and develop properly, and maybe it just hadn't sunk in yet that it was actually happening, but I felt horrible for not instantly being "in love." That was, until I saw the ultrasound. I think I've watched the DVD of it about 20 times.  And that love grows daily.  Yesterday during the health scare was the first time it truly ran through my mind "what will happen if we lose this baby?" and I realized, I'm certainly attached now. I would be absolutely devastated. Even though I heard the heartbeat yesterday, I'm counting the days til we get to see him or her again (and find out if it's a him or her!) on March 26.

While these things may seem absolutely obvious to most, they are things I've had to process and re-learn and wanted to blog about to keep as a memory for me.  And we still have 25 weeks left of this pregnancy journey! I can't wait to see what else God reveals to me during this time.

A Lot Going On!

Since it's been several weeks since I blogged last, I thought it would be a good time to give an update on things going on.  It seems like the time since we have found out about this baby in December has FLOWN by. I'm sure the next 6 1/2 months will feel the same!

Last week, we got a peek of our precious little baby.  He or she was doing great! The ultrasound was 3D/4D and SO cool. I'll post a few pics below.  They also gave us a DVD of the whole ultrasound, and I think I've played it about 15 times. It's still so hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that this is real, that our prayer has been answered, and that God is faithful!  There were so many days I seriously thought this would never come true.

Baby waving! He or she kept saying hi!

Sleeps all curled up, just like it's mama!

During the ultrasound, the baby was moving up a storm. The ultrasound tech said it was "dancing." Yep, it's Eddie's child - I'm sure it's already dancing in there! ;)  Heartbeat was a good 170bpm - I always tear up when I hear it.  We go back for our next Dr. appt at the end of Feb, and will find out what the sex is on my birthday, March 26.  What an awesome birthday present that will be!

They also moved my due date up to Aug. 15, making me 11 weeks instead of 10. I'm counting down the days to the end of the first trimester and praying for relief from the morning sickness (which should really be called "All day sickness". The term "morning sickness" teases you - how I wish it was only in the morning!)  From about 8 weeks through last week, I physically felt awful. Some days, the physical effects (and hormones, I'm sure) took an emotional toll - I'm so used to being independent, and Eddie has had to do everything for me - cook, clean, laundry, etc... I felt like my life wasn't my life anymore.  I'm so thankful I have an amazing husband!! Luckily, the last few days have been much better. Praying they continue!

Eddie leaves to go home to Colombia and visit his family soon.  I'm so excited for him to go home, but of course he will be greatly missed!! Please pray for safe travels for him.

Thanks again for all your prayers and support! They mean so much to us :)

Brittney

Our Sun Stand Still Prayer Answered. :)

Over the last 6 months, both mine and Eddie's lives have been radically transformed after reading the book Sun Stand Still.  This book, for those who haven't read it, is about how to take your normal, everyday prayers and completely change the way you pray them.  Author Stephen Furtick challenges readers to have big, audacious prayers, make your case before God based upon his faithfulness to those like you in the Bible, and most importantly, to push and march while you pray.  A few quotes, just to give you an idea, say things like "what seems impossible for me isn't even remotely difficult for God," and "prayer is not a last resort, it's a nuclear weapon".  Read it, you won't be disappointed.

After reading the book together around August, Eddie and I completely changed our way of praying our one big, audacious prayer - to have a child.  One of our main issues with the whole situation had been that we had never heard a clear "yes" or "no" from God.  After reading the book, we decided we were going to take the next step and keep marching forward until God answered our prayer or stopped us.

We looked into adoption and saw a doctor to get back on fertility medicine at the same time, knowing God would lead us down the path he wanted for us.  We completely opened up to our life group about our struggles with having a child, and support just poured in.  For the last several months, we have received phone calls, text messages,  and emails almost daily of people praying for us.  I cannot stress enough how much we appreciate it.  For the first time since we started this journey, we clearly heard God saying "just have faith, good things are coming soon."

And they finally have.  After only one month of fertility medicine this round, we are pleased to announce our first child will arrive in August.  Eddie and I are completely overjoyed and filled with gratitude for those who completely covered us in prayer these last 6 months.  We could never thank you enough.

So many scriptures describe what we are feeling right now, but Psalm 103:1 pretty much sums it up:

"Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name."

Thanks to God has continually come from our mouths the last several weeks.  We are and will continue to praise God for his goodness and faithfulness.

Our Sun Stand Still prayer has been partially answered.  Please pray with us for our child to develop normally and be healthy through the entire pregnancy.  We know what awesome things God can do!

Brittney, Eddie, and Baby Gomez